There's a special kind of overwhelm that comes with stepping into a leadership role for the first time. You're suddenly responsible not just for your own work, but for the performance, wellbeing, and day-to-day experience of an entire team. And in most cases, nobody actually sits you down and tells you what that's going to feel like.
Here are some of the things that often catch new managers off guard (and what to do about them) from our General Manager, Teesha.
You don't have to know everything
One of the most common traps new leaders fall into is believing they need to have the answer to every question. If a team member comes to you with a problem, surely you should be able to solve it, right?
Not necessarily. Your job as a leader is to direct people, remove roadblocks, and make sure the right person is working on the right thing. It's not to be the resident expert in every single function of the business.
If a team member asks you something you don't know, the most valuable thing you can do is connect them with someone who does. Your team are the experts in their roles. Trusting that (and letting them own it) is what good leadership actually looks like. Trying to do it all yourself, or hovering over every task because you feel like you should understand it, tips quickly into micromanaging.
Everyone needs to be managed differently
This one sounds obvious until you realise how often we default to communicating with everyone the same way.
Some people on your team will want the brief, the deadline, and then to be left to get on with it. Others will want to build a bit of a relationship first (check in about the weekend, ease into the work conversation) before they feel comfortable engaging. Neither approach is wrong, but if you use one style with everyone, you'll always be missing the mark with somebody.
A useful way to think about it: two walkie-talkies on different channels. The person talking might be saying exactly the right thing, but if the frequencies don't match, the message doesn't land.
The simple way to get better at this is to pay attention. Mirror back the energy someone gives you. If they're direct and task-focused, be direct and task-focused. If they're warm and conversational, make time for that before you get into the details. You'll start to feel the difference.
You can't be everyone's friend
This is one of the harder realities of moving from being part of a team into leading one. The dynamic shifts, even with people you were previously close to. That doesn't mean you can't be warm, supportive, and genuinely care about your team - you absolutely should. But there's a difference between being a good leader and trying to be liked by everyone.
There will be times when you need to have difficult conversations: when someone's behaviour is affecting the team, when a deadline keeps slipping, when something needs to be named. If you've been avoiding those conversations because you don't want to rock the boat, you're creating a gap in trust.
When you do need to address something, do it quickly and do it privately. Don't let it build. The longer you leave it, the bigger the conversation becomes. And when you have it, you can still be on their side "this is out of character for you, how do we get things back on track?" is very different from a formal dressing-down.
The other thing worth knowing: some team members, especially when you're new to managing them, will test the boundaries. They're not necessarily being malicious. They're figuring out where the lines are. The earlier you set those clearly, the less you'll have to manage around them later.
Your team's problems will start to feel like your problems
When you step into a leadership role, you become the person people bring things to. Not just work problems, sometimes personal ones too. And if you're someone who genuinely cares about the people around you, it's easy to absorb all of that and carry it as your own.
A lot of new leaders aren't prepared for just how much there is to hold.
The important thing to remember is that your role is to listen and support, not to personally solve everything that lands on your desk. Often people don't actually need a solution, they just need to feel heard. Sitting with someone, letting them talk it through, and being a calm presence can be genuinely valuable even if you walk away without having fixed anything.
And on the flip side, there will be times when someone does need you to step in and make a call. Reading the room on which is which gets easier with time.
Leadership is lonely
This one surprises most people, because you're surrounded by people all day. You're in meetings, conversations, and the thick of everything. And yet there's a particular kind of loneliness that comes with being the person everyone talks to, because it means there are very few people you can talk to in return.
There are decisions you carry alone, frustrations you can't share with your team, conversations you can't have because of confidentiality or hierarchy. And the higher up you go, the more that gap can feel.
The best thing you can do is find your people: a business partner or peer, a business coach, a networking group where other leaders are navigating the same terrain. If you don't already have someone you can be honest with about the harder parts of leading, making that a priority is one of the most practical things you can do for yourself and for your team.
Nobody gets leadership perfect, it's a long game. But recognising your own growth, and noticing when a situation that once felt enormous now feels manageable, is worth paying attention to. Most of the time, no one else is going to hand you that validation. You have to give it to yourself.
